I think I Got My Xmas Gift.

I complain and think about how life might be better with my dh in it. I think someday I may have a novel about everything he has put me through.

But,

It took another man's "leading" conversation to convince me that my dh will always be my spouse.

I spoke to an old friend from my past and he started to flirt with me which was a little uncomfortable and I literally cut him off and hung up.  But this made me realize that despite EVERYTHING, my heart belongs to my dh. He might be so incredibly imperfect, but he fits me. I cant explain in any more detail except that I know I could never be with anyone else.

I have needed that kind of reassurance...for years.

I feel that now, and somehow someway I will get him to show more and be more loving, but i know I love him and I had lost that.  But I found him and whenever I feel I lost again I think I will remember that panic that came in and brought my love out.

beme.